An Open Apology to the Thief Who Stole My IPOD…

Posted on December 17, 2008

May Karma Be With You...

May Karma Be With You...

Dear “Person” Who Stole My IPOD,

Yeah, I know it was like a month ago. I guess I thought you’d eventually feel bad and return to sender. At this point, I’m grieving.

Sure, I have all the music on my computer. In better fiscal times, I probably would’ve pretended to be saddened by the loss but been internally elated at the opportunity to go down to the Apple store and upgrade my 2006 model for the sleeker 2008/2009 version. Alas, today is not that day.

My mourning process has been agonizing.

Thoughts of the thousands of miles we’d traveled together haunt me…

The memories of the countless late nights when you quietly comforted me in the darkness…

That time at Chappy’s when I realized that insomnia is no fun at all without Internet… you were there. And now you aren’t.

Still, I’ve had a month to reconcile these thoughts and mentally move on. And it was only today that it occurred to me that I owe YOU an apology, Kind IPOD Thief.

I am truly repentant for the gay pop rock anthems that you’ve endured. I’m sorry that you have to sift through Playlists with super-descriptive names like “Travel and Rock Out” (it was an inside joke, not intended for someone on the outside) and “Great Workout” which includes rad songs by prolific artists like Natasha Beddingfield and Fergie.

Still, I encourage you to navigate through the unfamiliar names and chart new territory. You’ll be pleased. Seriously, since you felt the need to steal one of three physical objects that has any meaning to me at all, I do hope you’ll take the time to learn the beauty of artists like Guts and Apparat and Ladytron and Elodie O.

And again, I’m sorry for the most intimate glimpse you stole into the corny parts of my mind. I assure you that if you move through the “Toxic” Britney Spears and “Africa” Toto stuff, the rewards will be plentiful.

Slightly defiled but totally getting on with it,

The Girl of the Water~

Filed Under People of Interest, Sigh |

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